Today is the last day I will be a twenty something. It's the last
day I feel like I am in that young lady range. Tomorrow, I will be thirty.
What's the difference between today and tomorrow? Well, I am not quite sure. I
sure do know that this is not what I expected I would feel at thirty. I'm not
feeling like I am an old lady now or anything like that. However, it is just
surreal. How am I thirty? Wasn't I just ten or twelve? I remember not even
being able to imagine what it would be like at thirty. When I was ten, I
imagined I would just be married and have lots of babies! Then in my later teen
years, I kind of felt like when I was thirty, I would have it all together. I
felt like I would have this great career as a teacher, teaching second grade in
a good district. I would maybe be married and have one baby by now. I now look
back and think about how life goes by in the blink of an eye. I can remember so
many of my birthdays vividly. I have so many memories from my childhood and I
feel like it was all just yesterday. I feel this way for myself, and now here I
am raising a 7 year old, 4 year old and 1 year old. How is this happening? It
probably sounds so silly to keep questioning how, but really, I cannot grasp
it. Sometimes I struggle with how fast life moves. It makes me so sad that my
kids are growing up so quickly. I can only imagine how my mom feels. I am her
baby, and here I am turning thirty. I still feel like I am barely a twenty year
old and my sisters are not much older than that.
I have to say, turning thirty is
refreshing. Growing up, I feel like we were taught not to ask a woman her age.
Growing old was something to be embarrassed of for women. I am proud to be
thirty. So what, I still have a year and a half left on my degree. So what, I
haven't lost the 15 pounds I have wanted to lose the past 6 months. You know
what? I have my husband. He is one heck of a man. He loves me more than I
imagined anyone ever could. We have been thru it all, and still, we have come
out better than before. We have built this life together that is just
wonderful. It's not perfect, but it’s perfect for us. We have these three
awesome kids that drive us nuts and make our hearts melt in the very same
minute. I don't think I ever imagined my life holding this much love at thirty.
I don't think I ever imagined being as happy as I am (well minus the bad days
in there obviously!). I am lucky, I am grateful and I am happy.
Instead of dreading growing older, I am
going to embrace this new decade of my life. I am leaving behind my twenties
and being "young", but gaining a time in my life where I am hoping to
just become more confident and stronger as a wife, mother and just as MYSELF. I
am hoping my thirties brings new and exciting changes for our family and
hopefully takes us back to our roots. I feel like I conquered a lot in my
twenties. I got married, I carried and gave birth to three children, I moved to
Germany, I moved to Kentucky, I moved to Georgia, I proudly stood by my husband
and raised our children while he was in Afghanistan for 27 months. It's not a
career and maybe I didn't party hard in my twenties, but I have so much more in
my life than I anticipated at this point. Every day I am grateful that life has
taken me where it has.
So here is goodbye to my twenties and
hello to turning thirty. I am ready for all it has to offer!
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